Looking for the True Self

Looking for the True Self

Introduction

Who are we at our core? How much of our identity is truly ours, and how much is shaped by external influences? The search for the true self is a journey many embark on, often without realizing that the layers of expectations, societal pressures, and learned beliefs can sometimes distance us from our authentic selves.

The Person-Centred Approach, pioneered by Carl Rogers, plays a crucial role in this exploration. It emphasizes congruence (realness), unconditional positive regard (non-judgment), and empathy—key elements that allow individuals to reconnect with their authentic self.

The Impact of Early Experiences on Self-Identity

Carl Rogers believed that every individual is born with an organismic self, a true, naturally positive core. However, as we grow, our environment—especially our caregivers and educators—shapes our self-perception.

For example, imagine a child who is only praised for academic success. They may internalize the belief:
💭 “I am only worthy of love if I get good grades.”

Over time, this belief may lead to:
✔ Prioritizing achievements over well-being.
✔ Ignoring personal needs (such as rest, socialization, or self-care).
✔ Experiencing anxiety or burnout from constant pressure.

This internalized message, known as a condition of worth, can push individuals further away from their true self, leading to psychological distress and a feeling of incongruence with who they truly are.

Therapy as a Path to Reconnecting with the True Self

Recognizing and deconstructing these conditions of worth is essential for personal growth and emotional well-being. Therapy provides a safe and supportive space where individuals can:
✅ Identify internalized beliefs that no longer serve them.
✅ Challenge and replace unhelpful thought patterns.
✅ Reconnect with their authentic, organismic self.

This process isn’t always easy, but with the right therapeutic relationship—one based on empathy, congruence, and non-judgment— meaningful change can take place.

Conclusion

The journey toward self-discovery isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about peeling back the layers of external expectations and rediscovering who you were all along. Living in alignment with your true self brings a sense of clarity, confidence, and emotional well-being.

At The Therapeutic Triad, we provide a safe and supportive space to guide you through this journey. Book your first session today with 25% off and take the first step toward living in alignment with your true self.